stimes you gotta trust your gut, unless you're calvin chan.
woke this morn prematurely, cannot sleep early at all. rewoke again, took care of some items, delivered the rest. unexpected delay, so reheaded back to service, followed by party all day at brother's place. still gotta get my bearins back on the old school stuff. also gotta learn to deal with frantic kids better.
headed to andy's after fer some chill time. played mafia and liar's poker through to the midnight, gettin squashed left and right. back to base soon after, took care of some packin, need to get ready fer tmr-hopfly a land onto somin big, if not, then at least outta the house.
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understandin more about, and the need for flowin freely, as well as the diffrence tween that and freeflow. one is true expression, the other is a rehash of another one's ideas.
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peace comes from knowing that the world is a better place whether you are here or not.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Saturday, February 13, 2010
raisin bran, sparkling water
procrastinatin what could be destiny. faithfully should be carried out first though.
tried this honey tranqulizer tip that i learned last night from family-it failed, and my legs ached as a result. woke to take care of some messages, check the mail, and see what was goin on in the internets. gamed fer a lil bit, and watched some old tv movies.
headed out to somerville to pick up a package. dumped in the middle of nowhere, got lost and accidently stumbled onto Tufts University. saw some of the campus, caught the "joey", and headed back to base from Davis.
project still left to do, makin some ol soup fer din. not wantin to yell on the web again tday.
=====================================================================================
tmr a couple things to look forward to. only lookin to do one thing though, and it involves sitting on a couch.
====================================================================================
cgi's ruined a ton of movies. visual flair makes us all picasso fanatics.
tried this honey tranqulizer tip that i learned last night from family-it failed, and my legs ached as a result. woke to take care of some messages, check the mail, and see what was goin on in the internets. gamed fer a lil bit, and watched some old tv movies.
headed out to somerville to pick up a package. dumped in the middle of nowhere, got lost and accidently stumbled onto Tufts University. saw some of the campus, caught the "joey", and headed back to base from Davis.
project still left to do, makin some ol soup fer din. not wantin to yell on the web again tday.
=====================================================================================
tmr a couple things to look forward to. only lookin to do one thing though, and it involves sitting on a couch.
====================================================================================
cgi's ruined a ton of movies. visual flair makes us all picasso fanatics.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
bagel and sweet tea
as i sit in my room, i come to the conclusion that silence isn't so bad when you're not being oppressed.
tried wakin up on time tday, but another fail again. made it successfully right when the back to the day buffet began. made some breakfast, unwounded, and checked some msgs. took care of some sales in the early and mid-afternoon, while learnin how to play zombies. spent some time lookin fer a card: papyrus has terrible customer service.
after gettin the one i wanted, took the long way to gcenter to meet up with matt from bls. lotta nice buildins we got, lots of churches in the neighborhood, and learned more about the reshift in businesses. played some charity poker and was unfortunate in 3 separate occasions. a fight was also bout to brew-talked to the main instigator, but he was prolly in one ear, out the other syndrome.
headed back to base. caught the silver line, and found some documents about how to save your money and manage your expenses, while lookin fer an empty seat. also got some massive headache, prolly through the heaters. cleaned up some stuff at home, makin dinner, lookin to relax through the night. too bad CRoads is cancelled this week.
==================================================================================
while siftin through those papers on the bus, i found a dolphin picture, and some information about IDA accounts, which basically reward ppl for saving and being very intelligent with their budgeting. the thing that intrigued me the most was this piece of paper along with it labelled Value Rankings.
in it, one is asked to rank 14 different things in terms of their importance to you. i forgot the name of the person, but all i rember was it was a girl who was in a low income family, and who was possibly in her middle teen years or perhaps grown up.
in order from most important to least important. some of them have this female's personal description of a value; i will add my own commentary in parentheses.
1. Happiness - To feel good about everything in my life
2. Inner Harmony - To accept myself flaws & all
3. Sense of Accomplishment - To feel like I've finished something
4. Financial Security - To be comfortable with having enough money
5. A comfortable life - To not let things bother me
6. Personal Freedom - To be able to do what I want [positive]
7. Family security - That my family is taken care of
8. Wisdom (King Solomon would be rolling in his grave)
9. A world of beauty
10. An exciting life
11. Self-respect (I like how this one is less important than an exciting life, or that it's not even in the top 5)
12. Social Recognition
13. Health
14. National Security (Take that, America...)
The top 3 things dealt with accepting one's self and dealing with one's own place in the world. the next things talked about personal freedoms and stability within one's environment. the last couple of things were attributable more or less to situations in one's life that is out of their own control. makes me wonder how i'd prioritize these values myself..but i guess things change depending upon your own family and ability to be satisfied with what you have, rather than what you could have or could have been.
===================================================================================
reading is so fundamentally important-it has served me well this day, and many days more. and no, books aren't the only thing i'm talkin about.
tried wakin up on time tday, but another fail again. made it successfully right when the back to the day buffet began. made some breakfast, unwounded, and checked some msgs. took care of some sales in the early and mid-afternoon, while learnin how to play zombies. spent some time lookin fer a card: papyrus has terrible customer service.
after gettin the one i wanted, took the long way to gcenter to meet up with matt from bls. lotta nice buildins we got, lots of churches in the neighborhood, and learned more about the reshift in businesses. played some charity poker and was unfortunate in 3 separate occasions. a fight was also bout to brew-talked to the main instigator, but he was prolly in one ear, out the other syndrome.
headed back to base. caught the silver line, and found some documents about how to save your money and manage your expenses, while lookin fer an empty seat. also got some massive headache, prolly through the heaters. cleaned up some stuff at home, makin dinner, lookin to relax through the night. too bad CRoads is cancelled this week.
==================================================================================
while siftin through those papers on the bus, i found a dolphin picture, and some information about IDA accounts, which basically reward ppl for saving and being very intelligent with their budgeting. the thing that intrigued me the most was this piece of paper along with it labelled Value Rankings.
in it, one is asked to rank 14 different things in terms of their importance to you. i forgot the name of the person, but all i rember was it was a girl who was in a low income family, and who was possibly in her middle teen years or perhaps grown up.
in order from most important to least important. some of them have this female's personal description of a value; i will add my own commentary in parentheses.
1. Happiness - To feel good about everything in my life
2. Inner Harmony - To accept myself flaws & all
3. Sense of Accomplishment - To feel like I've finished something
4. Financial Security - To be comfortable with having enough money
5. A comfortable life - To not let things bother me
6. Personal Freedom - To be able to do what I want [positive]
7. Family security - That my family is taken care of
8. Wisdom (King Solomon would be rolling in his grave)
9. A world of beauty
10. An exciting life
11. Self-respect (I like how this one is less important than an exciting life, or that it's not even in the top 5)
12. Social Recognition
13. Health
14. National Security (Take that, America...)
The top 3 things dealt with accepting one's self and dealing with one's own place in the world. the next things talked about personal freedoms and stability within one's environment. the last couple of things were attributable more or less to situations in one's life that is out of their own control. makes me wonder how i'd prioritize these values myself..but i guess things change depending upon your own family and ability to be satisfied with what you have, rather than what you could have or could have been.
===================================================================================
reading is so fundamentally important-it has served me well this day, and many days more. and no, books aren't the only thing i'm talkin about.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
reflections on Luke 2:40-52
can't tie my shoe if my life depended on it.
tnight, we went oer the sermon that was this sunday about Jesus and his full life, starting with a scene from his early life. it made a lot of us think and redefine our definitions of full life, old life and how to live our lives.
in our lives at least in the middling ages on, we grasp a plan of our life, starting with work, family, perhaps marriage and kids, retirement, leading to a relaxing decline to death. we put our best efforts to put our lives accordingly into this plan, by agonizing about our 401k, boosting our physical well-being, saving for our future and children. everyday, we look forward to the "new tomorrow" when in reality, we are struggling to reach a number, an endpoint, a destination.
even to retirement, our mindsets turn into, "let's spend time with our kids, travel the world, see things". even so, our lives are not fulfilled or finished; the world keeps growing and offering more and more. when we become closer to death, we think and compare our days and times to points of the past, to people we know whom perhaps have accomplished more at an earlier time, or did things that we haven't done yet, but intrigue us.
if we see our lives as simply a laundry list, a quota to be reached, then we will not see the end of it. there is, frankly, too much for this world to offer-we will not be able to keep up with the ever changing, this force of society. it is perhaps in this way of thinking that we grow in allegiance to this world, become more tied and wanting of it, to experience more and more and grasp as much as we can before we inevitably go.
we step back to the portrait of Christ and his life as a testimony, to which one person in our small group insightfully said that it was a ministry of giving, growing richer and deeper, as relationships and wisdom flourished, and that in this respect, he lived a full life. this is in contradict to our typical path of life, in which we want to take and take so much, ever wanting.
from this i'd want to take away a lesson and say that life should be ever flexible, that giving ourselves to another should be the prime purpose of our lives. straying away from physical milestones, to not put our lives in terms of a number, to not mechanize and compartmentalize our lives.
tnight, we went oer the sermon that was this sunday about Jesus and his full life, starting with a scene from his early life. it made a lot of us think and redefine our definitions of full life, old life and how to live our lives.
in our lives at least in the middling ages on, we grasp a plan of our life, starting with work, family, perhaps marriage and kids, retirement, leading to a relaxing decline to death. we put our best efforts to put our lives accordingly into this plan, by agonizing about our 401k, boosting our physical well-being, saving for our future and children. everyday, we look forward to the "new tomorrow" when in reality, we are struggling to reach a number, an endpoint, a destination.
even to retirement, our mindsets turn into, "let's spend time with our kids, travel the world, see things". even so, our lives are not fulfilled or finished; the world keeps growing and offering more and more. when we become closer to death, we think and compare our days and times to points of the past, to people we know whom perhaps have accomplished more at an earlier time, or did things that we haven't done yet, but intrigue us.
if we see our lives as simply a laundry list, a quota to be reached, then we will not see the end of it. there is, frankly, too much for this world to offer-we will not be able to keep up with the ever changing, this force of society. it is perhaps in this way of thinking that we grow in allegiance to this world, become more tied and wanting of it, to experience more and more and grasp as much as we can before we inevitably go.
we step back to the portrait of Christ and his life as a testimony, to which one person in our small group insightfully said that it was a ministry of giving, growing richer and deeper, as relationships and wisdom flourished, and that in this respect, he lived a full life. this is in contradict to our typical path of life, in which we want to take and take so much, ever wanting.
from this i'd want to take away a lesson and say that life should be ever flexible, that giving ourselves to another should be the prime purpose of our lives. straying away from physical milestones, to not put our lives in terms of a number, to not mechanize and compartmentalize our lives.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
cinnabon, sweet tea, scone
reading is very important in a nation of technological marvels and advances. after all, how can you get the machines workin without reading the manual?
woke up early due to sounds of construction on my street, which prompted an early response back to sleep. at 9, fig'd was too tired and rewoke at 10. ran some errands involving mailin some textbooks via half.com. also screamin at my comp cause ppl decided to steal dj hero for reasons unknown. watched some tv, played some games fer a bit. turned 45 minutes of agony into 3 hours of semi-triumph.
headed out to chi-town fer the lions' dinner. standard china pearl affair, same food, same agenda, same everythin. got some random guy to sing karaoke at our table; was bout to sing after, cause i promised, but they shut down when i was bout to bust it.
back to base, a lil debating about tactics and the supremacy of smart ppl, while reading about total depravity and public order crimes on wiki. plannin what to do tmr, and possibly how to waste my last years, either floundering or fading.
===================================================================================
last night and tnight made me think bout how vulnerable one can be, given they remain oblivious to the situations before them. yknow, i thought things were peachy keen, but i was delusional. cause of that, i feel a lil...heartbreak and confusion inside, but wisdom comes when truth is finally revealed.
when i come back from events of sorts, i wonder what it really amounts to. leavin an impact on folks and a world that i exist in-hasn't really happened, or at least i'm disappointed at the efforts. guess that's what psalm 90 is about.
coming into spring, hopefully the season will change for the better. this winter's not bad due to the weather, nor the storm or the time, but that there's no warmth around.
====================================================================================
my heart's desire right now is to express myself, perhaps shrouded by pride and false humility, in which ways i can. through song, through intellect, through common sense. but it's not mine to use, only mine to be lent out to others, for others.
woke up early due to sounds of construction on my street, which prompted an early response back to sleep. at 9, fig'd was too tired and rewoke at 10. ran some errands involving mailin some textbooks via half.com. also screamin at my comp cause ppl decided to steal dj hero for reasons unknown. watched some tv, played some games fer a bit. turned 45 minutes of agony into 3 hours of semi-triumph.
headed out to chi-town fer the lions' dinner. standard china pearl affair, same food, same agenda, same everythin. got some random guy to sing karaoke at our table; was bout to sing after, cause i promised, but they shut down when i was bout to bust it.
back to base, a lil debating about tactics and the supremacy of smart ppl, while reading about total depravity and public order crimes on wiki. plannin what to do tmr, and possibly how to waste my last years, either floundering or fading.
===================================================================================
last night and tnight made me think bout how vulnerable one can be, given they remain oblivious to the situations before them. yknow, i thought things were peachy keen, but i was delusional. cause of that, i feel a lil...heartbreak and confusion inside, but wisdom comes when truth is finally revealed.
when i come back from events of sorts, i wonder what it really amounts to. leavin an impact on folks and a world that i exist in-hasn't really happened, or at least i'm disappointed at the efforts. guess that's what psalm 90 is about.
coming into spring, hopefully the season will change for the better. this winter's not bad due to the weather, nor the storm or the time, but that there's no warmth around.
====================================================================================
my heart's desire right now is to express myself, perhaps shrouded by pride and false humility, in which ways i can. through song, through intellect, through common sense. but it's not mine to use, only mine to be lent out to others, for others.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
fergot my breakfast.
with the state being known now as "red", will it change the direction of our country? or is it ppl simply being paranoid of parties?
woke up ear/late after hittin the snooze again. need to figure out what's goin on, maybe it's sleep apnea. played some games in the afternoon, and entertained some guests while takin care of the finances. headed out to NEU to have dinner with some the TWIGS folks, followed by some pool at the student center. (note to self, kirklin is a scratch master)
came back to base, an pretty much twiddled my thumbs to the end of the night. watched the fb updates bout coakley losing and the state goin to hell. in my mind, i could only laugh and cry a little inside, pitying our people.
=====================================================================================
...these strawberry bars are too syrupy
woke up ear/late after hittin the snooze again. need to figure out what's goin on, maybe it's sleep apnea. played some games in the afternoon, and entertained some guests while takin care of the finances. headed out to NEU to have dinner with some the TWIGS folks, followed by some pool at the student center. (note to self, kirklin is a scratch master)
came back to base, an pretty much twiddled my thumbs to the end of the night. watched the fb updates bout coakley losing and the state goin to hell. in my mind, i could only laugh and cry a little inside, pitying our people.
=====================================================================================
...these strawberry bars are too syrupy
Monday, January 18, 2010
two honey buns, arizona iced tea
this is a shout out to Will Ng, since it seems he may have checked this blog out: you host a great hot pot. chill environment, good view, nice ppl, and big tv!
woke up this mornin feelin beat, decided to snooze it, woke again at 11. killed some time in the mornin with readin, washin dishes and games, while gettin yelled at for bein inactive. had a chat with a friend and then headed out to neu territory for another friend's bday dinner. came back to base with an apple in the pocket. needin somethin to do now that involves...ppl?
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how fitting it was that everythin that i talked bout with my friend today bout what was gonna happen tnight happened exactly the way i thought it would.
=====================================================================================
true to yourself, and not to worry bout others or the rest :)
woke up this mornin feelin beat, decided to snooze it, woke again at 11. killed some time in the mornin with readin, washin dishes and games, while gettin yelled at for bein inactive. had a chat with a friend and then headed out to neu territory for another friend's bday dinner. came back to base with an apple in the pocket. needin somethin to do now that involves...ppl?
=====================================================================================
how fitting it was that everythin that i talked bout with my friend today bout what was gonna happen tnight happened exactly the way i thought it would.
=====================================================================================
true to yourself, and not to worry bout others or the rest :)
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