let's stuff 2 days into a post

that sleeping in anger from las night is REALLY helpin me get feel the need to get to bed much earlier.

saturday:
woke up to a chilly mornin. headed out to the hatch shell to help shoot a video fer Taskrabbit.com-am also participatin in the relay fer charity on marathon monday. dunno if i can pull 4 miles, but the will to succeed is there. had lunch at papa razzi, shoulda got the new york sirloin instead of the farfalle salmone...

darted to quincy center to meet Tackey Chan at his kickoff campaign announcement fer state rep. found out i was too late, but ran into him and his family as they were comin back from dunkin' donuts. got to talk about political issues, involvement and a battle plan fer the upcoming election.

came back to base, played some games. got angry so decided to sleep off a hot head. ended up wakin at 2, and replayed until 5. so ended the night.

sunday:
a quick nap where ended up wakin at 8, and not brushin my teeth, due to the quick drop. had congee fer breakfast and felt pretty satisfied. service and sunday school were arigh, cept was seein some sadness develop in front of me, but it's not my role anymore to change it. recruited some help for the upcoming movies, so keep an eye out.

go to c-town fer lunch cause royal palace dropped the ball in terms of serving ppl effectively. got a pork dish which made me, as a great thinker once said, "feel like a fatty". played some games fer a bit in the youth lounge, while messin around with sleepin people. definitely shoulda pasted something on stanley's face...

back to base, decided to start the relay training. was gettin into a progressive groove, and then i bottomed out by forgetting to drink water. returned back, showered, and then trained on the steps inside the building-(gettin winded from the stairs is prolly a bad thing...) looked some random wiki articles including the poland incident, animal rights, and tips on how to be a better runner. fallin asleep, so optin to rest up fer tmr to a whole buncha nothin...need to secure business deals quick, cause fallin deeper into debt.

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2 types of selfishness that fall into extremes. one is the classic "it's all me, me, me!" deal where everythin revolves around one person. pretty self-explanatory. the other is the one that i'm fallin into now, and lookin fer a way out. it's "i don't care bout me at all, and rather, let's fulfill other folks' stuff first."

why is that bad? think it falls into the category of tryin to heap false humility upon myself. or even so, it borders around reckless behavior. guess my tolerance for action is pretty high, but it shouldn't come to the point where it's the only craving, the only thing on the mind. after all, even the smallest of animals and the greatest of kingdoms feel a need fer self-preservation...the health of it all

seeing now that both extremes dehumanize the person in question. the former example turns the person into an entity which is only self-serving and consumes only for oneself. the other is simply a robot, mindlessly carrying out commands that users input into it. no thinking involved, no feeling...only the sense of "it must be done, regardless". this is my own challenge-to not become that professional that i once sought to be. folks don't need taskmasters-they need humans, they need company, they need friends.

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think from now on i'm prolly gonna speak a lil more, due to the fact i feel i'm fading too hard, at least by accident now, as opposed to when i looked to be the ghost of my fantasies. it's arigh either way i guess-either i stay fresh and impartial, or become immersed into the fabrics. we'll see how it works out next week.