I think it's been a while since I did some reflection in culture. The last time I talked about life being so-so different was from the trip to Canada, and even so, I don't think it'd be that much of a change (except for the whole Frenchiness). Anyways, I was coming back from Somerville to pick up an old Nintendo 64, the rain started to come down. It wasn't so much of the water or the weather, but it was the little obligations that come along with it. For me, it was the crappy umbrella I borrowed, the very porous backpack I wore, and the thirst that wasn't quenched. Plus when the train came into Sullivan Square station, it unloaded a wave of dripping for anyone unprepared. All I wanted to do until I reached New England Medical Center was veg out in my mind, but I knew I had to be alert for tonight. Even as I'm writing this entry, I fell behind in some work and instead decided to cradle myself in reading, which was probably not the appropriate action. During the last couple of stations, an individual came along with a man, who was standing on my left. This individual who reeked of alcohol became very vocal for this man on account of no one was giving up their seats. He also proceeded into a mini-diatribe about the disappearance of courtesy and that "the men, both young and old, should have got up" (A woman had done so, and also there was an empty seat as well). On the right side, another woman was asking another man to give up a seat, for he was occupying two of them. He refused, and the woman responded with a bit more hostility. Again, the man refused, and the woman gave up asking. From these coincidental yet related events that happened in the same area and time, I opt to reflect upon things pertaining to the realms of manners and individual interests. Perhaps chivalry is dead as they say, but I believe courtesy still exists. I cannot speak on behalf of the individual, but he did have a point of folks needing to be a bit more courteous to others, especially the elderly and encumbered. His presentation of his thoughts, ironically enough, could have been seen as self-righteous, which may have been a contributing factor as to why no one responded positively. The man who was also with the individual also did not seem as he desired a seat, nor in the very least wanted to trouble anyone for a seat, as witnessed in his speech. Personally, I think that everyone else was much more interested in being comfortable sitting down, not giving heed to this individual's words, considering it was bad weather. People's own self-interests are at hand, which also played a part in the other episode of "please give up your seat." The other man who was refusing a seat to the other woman-both people come into the wrong: the man for not giving up one of his seats, and the woman for cursing at the man. (A random thought comes into my mind that ties into this entry. Perhaps it is our own wanting to assert power, especially to beings whom we see as weak or inferior that both individuals acted like they did. The individual bolstered by liquid courage ended up yelling at a lady and her child, both who were in conservative Islamic garb, and the man did not give the seat to the woman. There seems to be a surge of self-seeking up in this piece.) At any rate, I come back to base looking for an answer to the death I feel in my heart, especially with the summer ending. Why does it feel that all I'm good at is burning bridges? Instead of expanding upon a network of associates, I actually am closing them down and shutting them out. Maybe this is my own individualism expressing itself...could this be the reason I feel so crushed? Fading away from society versus the willingness to isolate from it...
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